so it's been a while, but i'm back. i don't know why i kind of fell out of posting since i'm on live journal like - ALL THE TIME. best place to find graphics, you know? well, you probably don't know. but that's okay - i enjoy being misunderstood. well, most of the time. anyway - yeah. i'm back. just a short post to tell you that, i don't think you need all the gorey details. and when i have something a little more worthwhile to write, i'll be back. oh, here is worth while. jenn and i started a band! cool or what. i know. brendon urie, here i come.

i am so unbelievably proud of myself. it only took me a few months but i finally figured out haw to work my lj!!! so see the purty skin and the profile all nice and neat. i am proud. you should be too. and now that looking at it doesn't disgust me, i shall use it. as my full on journal. beware, it could get catty. or ugly. or graphic. who knows what life will bring? right now it brings shit. yes, a large pile of shit that is about to hit the fan. why you ask? well in my second stunning semester of college i am failing three out of five classes. and am not doing fantabulous in the other two. i wanted to drop one but i missed the deadline and the other two i don't know if i can make up the work seeing as the semester ends in two weeks. and i am way too much of a baby to go to the teachers and ask. and i don't know what to do. i can't tell my mom cause she would freak. but i can't get myself out the door to go to calss. i keep skipping and i feel horrible every time i do but i do it anyway. i am so screwed.

and what's worse is that next year i want to take the year off. but i don't know, maybe failing again will just reinforce that i need to not be in school right now. i mean, i just keep making the mistakes and the worse i do, the more self destructive i become. i just need to be somewhere else and doing something else. so i am looking into this program called interim programs and essentially it is an organization that takes kids who want to take a year off before or during college and places them in internships or intensives or service projects all over the world. i want to do a cultural immersion semester in italy and a scuba intensive in australia. i hope i can go, and i hope my horrible semester coming to light for my mother will not hurt that chance. i am so scared of her finding out. she'll kill me. i know it. i can see my cold and beaten body now 6 ft under ground. i am so fucking screwed!!!!!!

I am so not a happy person. I'm really not. I skipped my communication and thought class last friday because a) I overslept and b) I didn't have my paper done. Did I do my paper this weekend? Of course not. So I've been working on it now but I CANNOT find sources that work for me! And it's driving me. Plus my printer is jammed and I have absolutely no idea how to unjam it. On top of that I'm getting sick. I feel absolutely horrible and I honestly just want to drive home and have some of my mom's homemade chicken soup. I miss that soup.

Whining is done now. So onto the things that are good. I am assistant house manager for "The Last Night of Ballyhoo" which is pretty awesome. I'm basically in charge except that if anything goes really wrong, I can just turn to my House Manager for help. that is Patti DeMatteo and that chick is the love of my life. She's a senior and I'll miss her when she leaves. She is a lot like me which is probably why we get along so well. We work well together so it's all good.

My mom came up today to bring me my Midran because I am dying of migraines recently. We went out to breakfast and then we went to Kohl's. Smart right? My mother and I should not ever be allowed in Kohl's together. Or...really only I should be banned. It is impossible for me to go in there without draining my bank account. Or my mom's. Either way it is just bad. Today I got around $75 worth of clothes and that as only 1 and a half outfits and the coolest shoes ever.

So that is my life since my last post. Notice that there is no boy information. Or complaints about my roommate. But you never know who is reading these journals so I am definatly not going to put any of that. Suffice it to say I like a boy a lot and I dislike my roommate a lot. If you must know...find me and ask. And if you don't know me...sorry. You'll just have to imagine. Maybe one day I'll have the guts to post it here but right now I'm just trying to avoid a whole lot of confrontation.

Later Days
Dani

I remember

Vicki is obsesses. Amanda is obsessed. My work here is done. We went to the Renn Faire yesterday and we had a blast. Definatly the most fun I've ever had there. And the most money spent. I got a new belt, a racoon tail, a leather halter top, and a leather tattered skirt. I'm in love with my new renn clothes. Amanda is compeltely in love with TJ aka D'Artagnion. I am in love with Walter Raleigh. We're going to try and go back next weekend but we are soooo there on Pirate weekend. I can't wait to get back and I am so sad it'll be a week. I can't wait to hear the hottie bell. What is the hottie bell? Well, at the sword fighting circle, the boys there have a bell. And when they see a hot girl, or three as it was, they ring that bell. Makes you feel great. And I have never had so many guys start the flirting with me. Usually I'm the one approaching them but not this time. It was great. That is all I have to say. That and "I LOVE YOU RALEIGH!!"